Against the Odds

Sarah Taylor 

Against the Odds 

I am different, there is no doubt about that. I have always been fine with not fitting the average standard of normal, however, that all changed when my level of difference skyrocketed.  I am sure you are on the edge of your seat for an explanation of why I am not considered ordinary. 

I was born with a rare eye condition, it is called FEVR. My disability is so out of the norm, that it is something one would only hear about in a textbook. I went through life not worrying about my vision until last year when during a pickleball game, my left eye went blurry. 

We never realize how much something means to us until it is swiped right out from under our grasp. 

 “Your eye is bleeding internally,” that was the news I had never expected to hear.  I knew my chance of ever regaining my vision was slim, because of the lack of research in my case.

Months passed, and my left eye declined, the blood would come and go, my vision would fluctuate. I could think of nothing else, as I stared tirelessly out the window of the car, Christmas was nearly here, but this time, it lacked the magic. 

I could no longer see the Christmas lights as I peered out the window, that soft glow that once brought a smile to my face had now come to haunt me. I leaned my head against the glass, my heart shattering into a million pieces, each laced with fear, that my life would never be the same. I buried myself into a tunnel of what-ifs. 

What if nobody wanted me because I would just be a burden, and if someone did, I would never be able to see them if I lost all my vision. What if I never got to see what my own child looked like? Those were just the beginning stresses, as many more piled on top. 

There came a point when I could no longer see my own hand in front of my left eye. I had waited a year, for my vision to clear up, hoping that maybe the blood would go away, however, that had not worked, now it was time to go against the odds, it was time for surgery. 

I came to the conclusion, that I was not going to get my hopes up. Whatever the result, I would plunge forward in life. I was not less than anyone else, I just lived differently. 

Happiness does not come from what a person possesses, it is a choice. 

I walked alone into the hospital and soon found myself drifting into a darkened sleep. This time, I welcomed darkness, I was no longer afraid, it came upon me like an old friend. 

 It felt like an eternity before I finally woke up, I laid there my eyes shut. The surgery had gone well, but the doctors did not know if I had regained any of my vision. This would be the deciding moment.  

If darkness became my new existence, would I welcome it with hope and not despair? I knew it would be challenging, but I was strong enough to overcome that adversity.  

For 1 year I had watched as things gradually grew into nothingness; I waited and hoped that my vision would improve, but instead, I witnessed the world slowly fade away. 

“Open your eye,” I heard the doctor say, and at that moment, I slowly opened my left eye, the light streaming back in, everything came into view. 

I blinked, could it really be true? I looked around, the door, I could see it, with its beautiful wood fixture, and the baseboards around it, even the doorknob, I could see it all, it looked so wonderful, more glorious than ever before, and my hand, I could see that too, every knuckle, fold, and nail, everything was perfect. 

I could see the world, and oh was it a beautiful sight. 

Darkness is sure to come upon all of us, for trials bring darkness, physically and/or mentally. Let me ask you this question; When it comes, could you still have the strength to continue in life, for we are much stronger then we realize, if only we believe in the power of light. 

The End